How Not to Get Laid

(The story below comes from Dr. Blogstein who was kind enough to have me on his awesome radio show last night (CLICK to hear show). I challenged the doctor to send in a story he told about himself, a pair of 19-year-olds, and a dizzying moral dilemma. He came through, and it’s a story to which many of us self-professed “good guys” can relate. I now extend my challenge to everyone else. If you’ve been enjoying what you read on this site, the time has come to follow the good doctor’s example and share a story of your own! It won’t hurt, and I guarantee you’ll feel better afterwards. — SF)

Submitted by Dr. Blogstein, Age 31, NYC

I was on a cruise with five of my friends to celebrate my 27th birthday. It just so happened that my actual birthday night coincided with karaoke night on the ship. Exciting!

When dinner was over, we ran down to the ballroom where karaoke was to be held but alas all the slots were filled. I begged the girl to let me sing my rendition of Frank Sinatra’s New York, New York because it was my birthday. How could she say “no” to that? Sure enough, ten minutes later, she announces to the room that its my turn and also jokes that its my 21st birthday.

I sing and after my song I’m greeting by two delicious 19-year-old nursing students from Canada. They were chatting with me and joked around about me turning 21.

Only they weren’t joking around. By the end of the night, I realize that they really do think I’m 21 and I’m afraid that they’re close to finding out that I’m not.

I didn’t intend to deceive them and I didn’t want them to THINK that I had. But I thought that if I came clean now they’d think that I was only coming clean because they were figuring it out, and that would lead them to think that I MEANT to deceive them.

So, I did what any rational and drunk young man would do in this situation to make sure the girls still thought of him as honest — I started to lie.

I told all my friends that if they ask, I’m really 21, for if I came clean now, they’d think I was lying the whole time (great logic).

Anyway, now that I was lying and I knew that they really thought I was 21, I felt guilty about trying anything with them.

So, I suppose the moral is that having morals is one way HOW NOT TO GET LAID.

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