How Not to Get Laid

Submitted by Oblivious, Age 26, The Netherlands

I met this pretty young girl at sports, but didn’t really pay her much attention. We basically never said a word to each other for half a year, maybe a year or so. Then one evening, the group went out to a club, and all of the sudden, she came on to me quite aggressively. There was some close/erotic dancing, some kissing, but then she had to go, as she had to ride home with somebody.

Enter phase two: we exchanged msn addresses, and chatted until deep into the night. Cams were discovered, and digital fooling around was the next step in the evolution. She obviously liked attention, and I was eager to give it to her. She, however, made it clear “it” wasn’t going to happen between us. Although you can’t blame a man for trying, that reality started to sink in, and I had my peace with it.

A year passed, and nothing really happened besides online encounters. Then her parents went away on holiday and she asked me if I wanted to come over and meet her friends. I stayed there for a number of days. One evening, we were alone, the porn channel came on, and we started to fool around. She made it a bit of a challenge by playing hard to get, but was obviously enjoying the attention, and second base was explored for some time. Then, all of the sudden, she started squirming and said “no.” We are not talking a “no, giggle giggle,” here, we are talking a pretty firm “no.” I said “c’mon, like you mind,” and her reply was a sincere “yes.” So I stopped. I didn’t want to be that guy who oversteps the boundary set by the girl. I literaly *hate* those guys who can’t take no for an answer, and where the story ends up in some sort of rape, or deep regrets on one side. So, I stopped. Two days later, she was fooling around right before my eyes with another guy, and things basically went south from there between us, as I had developed a certain level of emotional attachment to her.

Some time passed, and after half a year we had occasional chats on msn. After a while, the event came up, and she said “I wouldn’t have minded if you had taken it further back then.” Now if I hate one thing more then the guys who can’t take no for an answer, it’s the girls who actually stimulate behaviour like that by playing mind games. Don’t get me wrong; the “dance of love” can be fun and challenging. Nothing more boring then shooting a fish in a barrel, and nothing wrong with playing a bit of hard to get sometimes, but there is taking things to far…

I was pretty close to hating her guts for the rest of my life, but after a while was able to shrug it off. We see each other at sports and on msn still, but the trust is gone, and will never be restored to the level it was. If the chance ever arises again, I am pretty sure I would not even bother to seize it either.

Did I smack myself on the head for not getting laid in the end? Of course I did! But I thank myself even more for not turning into that guy who can’t take no for an answer!

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