FAQ

I’m a guy. Can I submit a story about a girl I rejected?
I’m a girl. Can I submit a story about a guy who rejected me?
I’m gay. Can I submit a story about a homosexual non-encounter?
I have a story about a friend. Can I submit that?
In my story, we did end up having sex, but it all went wrong anyway. Can I submit that?

Yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes. I’m looking for all types of stories. Anyone rejecting anyone. Anyone screwing up anyhow. While it’s true that most stories involve girls rejecting guys (because guys are, more often than not, the idiots), I love those stories that are outside the box. So, go for it. I want to read them all!

Any DO’s or DON’Ts with regard to the stories I submit?

Try to make sure your story is between 1 and 1000 words long. I’m not a stickler for this, but I prefer stories that get right to the point and don’t ramble. Also make sure your story is not gratuitously pornographic, libelous, or otherwise incendiary. Interpret that as you will. Also, I tend to shy away from stories that are mean-spirited (example: a girl writes about a suitor in a wheelchair and she spends the whole story making fun of him because he’s in a wheelchair–not cool). In the DO category, I’ll simply say that the best stories are the ones that are true, honest, and personal. Do not fear embarrassment here. Tell us all the gory details. That said, if your story is only one sentence long, that’s terrific. We need one sentence stories too.

My friend’s story was posted before mine, but I sent mine in a week earlier?

Remember, stories are not posted in any particular order. Yours may be posted later that day or later that month. If I’ve just posted a story similar to yours, I may wait a bit before posting yours to space things out. Or I may not. I like to be surprising. So please be patient with me.

Why haven’t you posted my story or link?

Again, please be patient. Sometimes it takes a while to get to your e-mail, sometimes it takes even longer to post your story, but I will eventually read everything and respond.

Are you going to edit my story without my permission?

Probably not. I certainly won’t make any major changes without consulting with you first. But sometimes little things – a spelling mistake here, a comma here, maybe even eliminating a redundant word – I will occasionally make these little tweaks to a story in the interest of presenting that story in its best possible light. But again, don’t worry. I’ll notify you as soon as your story is posted, and if, for some reason, I’ve eliminated a comma that you felt particularly passionate about, we can make the necessary corrections before anyone is the wiser. Again, most stories will appear with few or no changes, and I have yet to receive any negative feedback for any incidental changes that I’ve made.

What’s the deal with the lame legal statement? I don’t like signing my rights away.

I know. Me neither. Legal statements always make me suspicious. But here’s the deal: this statement is there to protect me, not to screw you. I don’t want anyone to feel like they’re signing away a piece of their personal history by submitting to my site. All wrong. This is about sharing. If you’re a writer and you’re worried that by posting your anecdote on my site, that means you can’t use the incident in your memoirs later, don’t be. I’m not about to start suing people for retelling their own stories in a different way in a different format. This is just about covering my own ass. As of this writing, How Not To Get Laid is a venture that is making me zero money. But that may change in the future. Ad revenue may start pouring in. A couple years down the road, if we’re still around, we may publish a book of greatest hits. Hollywood may option the book and re-make it as a $300 million CGI spectacle featuring Julia Roberts in the role of the 100 foot tall alien fembot who rejects every earthling suitor for being too puny. Any number of things may happen, and the point is: I don’t want to get sued. So, the legal statement is here to cover my ass. That’s it. Nothing more. Don’t let it scare you away.

Will you post my e-mail address or my real name?

Your privacy is of utmost importance to me. I will only post your story and your name, age, and location as you write them in the subject line. If all you’re willing to give me is “Anonymous,” then that’s all I post. While I do prefer to have a name, age, and location for the stories I post, the inclusion of that info. will never affect whether or not I post your story. And if you choose to submit under an alias, that’s fine too. Finally, if you would like to have your name link to your website, then I’m more than happy to honor that request. Just include a note telling me what you want at the end of your story.

Dagnabbit! My question or concern wasn’t addresed in this FAQ page!

No worries. E-mail me at StewFox at gmail (d-o-t ) com.

More FAQ coming soon!!!